in memory of ryan dunn, pt. 10—april, phil and jess margera

What do you do when the kid who shared your kids' ups and downs and made himself part of our family dies? Every tribute, every picture makes me aware that he was there for good times and bad. When my son got shot up with a marble bomb, so was Ryan. When I yelled at my kids and they knew they were in trouble, Ryan knew he was in trouble with them. If we all hung out by the pool and laughed all day at dumb stuff, even though Ryan only LOOKED at the water, he was family. If we wanted to share good news, we called him. If something went on with our family, he was there.

How do I mend this sick hole in my heart? When the filming started, way back when, you were the one who always talked me through it and one of the only ones that helped me clean up! Even though you little daredevils were jumping in the sewer water and off bridges, smashing yourselves up on bikes and getting clotheslined, I always knew that you all would be here. I am supposed to go before the kids. It is almost two weeks since you have been gone, Ryan, and it is hitting me more each day. I think about Angie and pray that she gets through these days without you. I have to say, that the last few times we talked, you did seem to have a certain "peace" that I haven't seen before and I have to believe that you were in a pretty good place.

Several times a day, people come up to me and tell me how sorry they are for our loss, cards and letters come, and I realize that the world knows just how much we loved him. Ryan, I am keeping your phone number on my phone ... I am never deleting it. You were our friend and our "extra" son, and I will never forget you. We love you and miss you.

Love,

April & Phil

I met Ryan Dunn in 10th grade Graphic Arts class. One of our first assignments was to silk-screen a T-shirt for Earth Day. Our teacher, Mr. Rob, paired up me and Ryan for the project. What a mistake that was. After much laughter and sarcasm (something Dunn was a master of), we sketched up a design of an overflowing trash can with text over it that just said "Trash is good! Earth is dumb!" Needless to say, we shared the same messed-up humor and hit it off immediately. The next year, I started a band with some dudes from town and Ryan was the singer. He couldn't sing at all, but he was such a character and was so passionate about the idea of being in a band that there was no way I could say no to him.

That's the thing about Ryan, he was so passionate about everything all the time. It was very inspiring to be around him. For example, even if we were about to get in a shopping cart and slam through a fence into a brick wall, he would somehow talk me into thinking that it was going to be fun. He lived life full-force all the time with the pedal to the metal, and unfortunately for us, he drove that way, too. I mean, fuck, he flipped me in a Volkswagen Jetta ten times and they found me 40-feet away in the goddamn forest. But you know what? The very next day we were at school laughing our asses off about the huge traffic jam our accident caused. That car accident taught me one of the best things I have ever learned: To not sweat the small stuff in life. And Ryan Dunn taught me to never take yourself too seriously and that no matter what happens—good or bad—you can always find something to laugh at.

I feel lucky to have been Ryan's friend for the past 17 years. I feel lucky that I lost the high school "Battle of the Bands" with him. I feel lucky that I got to climb a mountain in the middle of Iceland with him. He was one of a kind, and it hurts so fucking bad to think that I'm not going to be able to see him anymore. I'm going to miss him so very much, every single day. I guess all I can really say is... thanks for all the laughs, Ryan. I hope you know how much you meant to all of us who were lucky enough to call you a friend.

—Jess Margera

Comments

[Kayleigh Brown]

Very sweet of you guys. Rest in peace Ryan.

[Bel]

Everytime I finish reading a tribute I'm determined that next time, I won't cry. Maybe next time.

If I feel this awful for someone I never even met, I can't even imagine how his friends and family are feeling.

RIP.

[Ariel]

rip ryan

[Smitty]

Rest in Peace Ryan Dunn

[Diego]

U.U we miss you U.U

[Anieck]

Wow. Made me cry.. again!
RIP Dunn

[Rolando]

Beautiful!

[Troll]

FIRST TO SAY FIRST!!!

[Lucas Andrade]

descanse em paz, iremos sempre lembrar de você aqui no brasil.

[Stacey LAird]

So true, so honest. He will be missed!

[Mryan12]

And that made me cry. Again. Thanks for sharing the memories. Even if they do make me tear up a bit.

[Hector Ruiz Jr]

R.I.P. Dunn

I like this pic of him at the end of the stunt he yelled, AHHH I think Im giving birth. LMAO!

[Mike Justesen]

So sad. RIP Ryan

[Lukstainateto]

um dos meuss heroiss...

[Cecilia]

lovely memories.
<3

[Rach Evans]

:( thats set me off again RIP DICK FARM DUNN :( XXXXXXXXXX

[andreewbollero24]

U guys are great Ryan will never be forgotten live on dickhouse

[belmaris]

i feel bad for u guys i know it's hard rest in paradise ryan

[Tilli]

Beautiful.

[Ally]

Thinking about you all! Stay Strong! I don't know Ryan, but i know he is the kind of guy that would never want to see his loved ones upset.

[Tiffany Bryant]

So sad..We all miss you Ryan.

[Jmud]

Thank you for sharing this with us.

[The Feo]

To the Margera family THANK YOU VERY MUCH I'm F-ing cryin after readin these words specially Bam ones ..no matter what we all gon miss Ryan forever RIP dude and thanks a LOT for the laughters ♥

[Okccuttie]

My heart goes out to all of you...R.I.P Dunn we love you!!!

[Whitney Moore]

R.I.P. DUNN! <3 :(

[ginger.thorton]

well he was a very lucky man to have such a lovein family and freinds and sooo loved around the world .im sure hes got heaven rollin on the floor with laughter

[stephen rowe]

rip ryan

[edu]

ta extrañaremos no hay quien sea el patiño de bam lugar que solo tu llenaste y te llavas contigo.

[patyfan]

Ryan is eternal i feel very much you miss i love you and aways love too

[ciara marquis]

It's so sad to read all of the writings of everyone that was close to Ryan. From the very first I saw of all you guys my heart was drawn to him. He just seemed.so down to earth and caring plus he had the best laugh. I know that as fans we didn't and don't truly know the people, family, and friends that made up this group. Even so, the death of Ryan is felt as if it was the death of one of my friends. I look up everything o can and read every tribute to him. I hope that people close.to Ryan are learning to live through the pain and remember good times, even when that can be hard. I love all of.you from the bottom of.my.heart and wish you all the best. Much love.

[Amanda]

Just don't know what to say - still shocked. It'll never ever be the same anymore.
9 months ago, I also lost a very good friend of mine.. he commited suicide. I'm still hurt and cry when I think of him.
I'm sorry, I don't know every name of the Jackass-crew. But I always remembered Ryan. Once he had a show where he changed the private rooms for enemies of his clients for getting revenge - It always was played before "Viva la Bam" in the german MTV. I can't remember the name of the show - But I watched it every day.

I'm so sorry for your loss - I'm sure he was a friend, you don't find very easily in this world..

Hoping you're well - according to the circumstances.

Love, Amanda

[tiff]

R.I.P. RYAN DUNN.....loved watching him do funny stuff,,and he is greatly missed....

[Allie]

he wuz so funny ill never forget the time i wuz watchin jackass and he stuck that toy car up his ass.he wuz a funny man and ill never forget him

[DatsWha?ShiiSaid!!!]

STILL CANT BELIEVE THAT THIS HAPPEN HE DIDNT EVEN DIE DO'N WHAT THE WORLD KNEW HE LOVE DO'N AND THAT BE'N A JACKASS REST N PARADISE RYAN DUNN 4EVVA MISSED

[AUTUMN]

ape and phil, i'm so sorry you guys lost your son and to jess i no how bad it hurts to lose your brother and friend. my thoughts are with you all. <3

Ever whisper of the breeze, every butterfly wing that touches my cheek, every kiss of the sun on my face. Reminds me that your not gone, your just waiting..

[DatsWha?ShiiSaid!!!]

there a JACKASS N ALL OF US

[Michelle Rager]

My heart and prayers go out to all Ryan's loved ones. When his horrible loss was announced, it reminded me don't take anything for granted. He is sadly missed across the entire country.

[Randy Ottesen]

I never met Ryan Dunn, but will miss him like a friend. R.I.P

[Lauren]

Ooo, this was one of the tributes I was dreading. D: I think we've all felt that we've grown up (in part) within the Margera family, but I know I cannot even begin to understand how much this loss must have affected them. I wish I could give them all a big, collective hug right now. <3

On a lighter note...I laughed so hard at "Trash is good! Earth is dumb!" and that photo of Jess and Ryan is really fantastic. They seriously look related! :)

[Marco]

R.I.P.
marco - from Italy

[jerome brown]

I kno how it must feel my prayers wit y'all and R.I.P Ryan Dunn

[Jenn Kaitlyn]

R.I.P ryan dunn
he was one of the funnieest ppl in jackass,an he will be missed

[Chelsea LaGrange Ortega]

Mrs. April and Mr. Phil,
I am so sorry for the loss of Ryan. It pains me to think that the biggest unsung hero of the jackass crew is gone. And Bam, I know that this is harder for you more than anyone else,and just know that even though I may be a complete stranger to you, feel free to email me if ever you need to talk.

[robin]

)= Mister Dunn

[gareth]

r.i.p ryan

[Terri Gilman]

my family recently suffered an unexpected death in our family too. My little brother Mark passed away at the age of 38. I wish I could say that it gets better with time, with my experience it hasnt. I can say that remembering him each and every day helps to ease the pain. My brother Mark loved Ryan in all the Jackass episodes. I can only hope he runs into him in the after life. That would truely make his day. May God grant you all peace and understanding in this time of sorrow.

[Cameron]

We will never forget you ryan

[Lisa Slomp]

Wow, this was really touching. I bet Ryan was a very special person in a lot of peoples lives. Somehow I feel very connected to all the stories although I didn't knew Ryan personally.
I wish that more people whould be like Ryan, he sounds like the best man you'll ever meet
All the way from the Netherlands: Rest in peace Dunn!
Take care family and friends

[mvp]

The is rly sad its like I can fell there pain but r.I.p. ryan

[Mrs S Tunstall]

Rest in peace Random Hero you will be missed every day and NEVER forgotten xx