dickhouse

season 2 of ridiculousness premieres tonight

 

Earlier this month we gave you a glimpse at the trailer for Season 2 of Ridiculousness. Then, this past Friday, the first celebrity (and Canadian!) couch guest was revealed. Well, tickle my taint if tonight ain't the night that Rob Dyrdek returns to the MTV at 10/9 C with an all-new hot batch of true life absurdities culled from the crevasses of the Interweb. (Yeah, like only David Attenborough can use that word. It doesn't take an epic and spectactular frozen planet to bring out the vocab-geologist in me—especially one that sounds exactly like it was smoothly uttered from the lips of a French-Canadian prostitute going down to spelunking town.)

Do you like to be teased? Do you turn to archived digital mediums for solace? Both your bases are covered here with a peek at tonight's episode and a link to Ridiculousness Season 1 now on DVD.

Ridiculousness - Full Episodes

(Photo by Rick Kosick; Hollywood, California 2012)

all-new loiter squad tonight on adult swim

Tonight is not just your usual all-new episode of Loiter Squad on Adult Swim at 11:30pm ET/PT. No, in fact, it's more. Much more. More of what? More on? Nope, not even.

Instead, for a select few of us that toiled in the toilet of jackassworld.com, it is a celebration of the arts—or rather the "artwins", Vanessa and Ashley Caswell.

The Caswells were definitely among the more "stand out" community members back then and they certainly contributed to the visual mythology of our site—even if it did burn faster (but not brighter!) than a lit fart from a cow's ass.

Anyway, here's a hearty "Cheers!" to the artful twins from me, Seth, and Josh on your work that appears in tonight's episode.

some ridiculousness with justin bieber

Do you go cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs? I never did as kid—much preferred Lucky Charms, go figure—but nowadays I go pigshit for page views. This past Tuesday we racked up a perfectly all natural Salma Hayek, but today I'm hoping to see a rock solid Pamela Anderson or at least a Tori Spelling (with or without the echo chasm ... I don't give a good goddamn). That said not said, we're tickled to announce the return of Rob Dyrdek and Ridiculousness to the MTV. Season 2 premieres the night of Monday, April 30th, at 10/9 C with Justin Bieber kicking off the celebrity couch craze alongside Chanel and Steelo. O Canadañia!

(Photo by Rick Kosick; Hollywood, California 2012)

skinema... the web show!

You may know him as Murray the Moderately Sober Elf, but we know him better as Chri$ Nieratko and boy oh girl-on-girl does this post bring me back to the days of Big Brother and working in Larry Flynt's tower of filth in Beverly Hills, California. Truth told, I never did see much in the way of porn stars or moderately hot sluts walking the halls or headed up to the 9th or 10th Floor in the elevators (I did once bump into Ray Liotta, but I'm not sure what he was doing there and I've never really cared to see him naked—poop, yes, but not be naked). The closest I ever did come to seeing anyone in the building on the frontlines of porn it was the man who worked security on the ground floor at the base of the elevators. He was a really nice guy, always happy and joking around, which isn't something you normally find in security guards—especially for a bank that shot straight up to the offices of a legendary man once openly fired upon and paralyzed. Apparently this man had a really, really big dick, the length of which earned him the nickname "Tripod". I always wanted to be called "Kickstand" as a kid, but I never physically lived up to that moniker and, if I had, it probably would've lead to a leathery life in rough trade or S&M circles. So it goes.

Anyway, if you're familiar with Chris's book Skinema then perhaps his new show will be right up your tailpipe. See the trailer here: http://www.vice.com/read/skinema-is-coming

johnny knoxville v. the oldbooth app 1.5

When I mentioned yesterday that Johnny Knoxville is incredibly super focused in his ADHD, I wasn't kidding around. Nor am I complaining now, mind you. On the contrary, I wish his train would derail more often in these parts of the Dickhouse hinterlands (a hair north of Mianus, a hair shy of Taintsville, but still a good ways from Knob Lick, just in case you were looking for directions and Google wasn't mapping it out). So here, in true jackass fashion, are the bonuses, the extras, and perhaps a few fool's gold nuggets from the further sidetracked adventures of Señor Knoxville in La Ciudad Perdida de los Piratas de Culo.

johnny knoxville v. the oldbooth app

All useless wooden toys aside, apps were tailor made for people with little to no attention span and/or those suffering from manic procrastination. Fortunately, Johnny Knoxville fits the bill on both counts—but with super focused precision—and just the other day he stumbled upon the "OldBooth" time suck. Well, one thing lead to another as he honed his picture placement skills and before he knew it there went most of the working day (the remains of which were no doubt frittered away in some other happily distracted manner). All was not lost, however, and here is the final collected fruit of his digital loom (I added the names, but feel free to come up with your own). It's good to be the Dickhouse waste receptacle and reservoir tip!

tonight on all-new episodes of fantasy factory...

And so it's come to this. The Season 5 wrap-up episodes of Rob Dyrdek's Fantasy Factory. My how time flies. This is what it sounds like. When doves cry. Funny what a little drama will do. When you clip your sentences such. Anyway, all of the above is true. Give or take some fallacy. So let's get on with the shows, Pink...

First up, it's back to the butt with Big Black and his new cuisine, "The Butt Break Special":

Fantasy Factory (Season 5) - Full Episodes

Then it's all alien in the workshop with "Beam Me Up, Rob":

Fantasy Factory (Season 5) - Full Episodes

all-new loiter squad tomorrow night on adult swim

Tomorrow night, the night of Sunday, April 22nd, to be nightly precise, Bam—Bam!—Margera will make a guest appearance on an all-new episode of Loiter Squad on the Adult Swim at 11:30pm ET/PT.

Once upon a time circa 1994-ish, Jeff Tremaine, Marc McKee, Earl Parker, and myself ventured out of the Big Brother offices in El Segundo, CA, for a night out in Hollywood. We were never hip to the hip fact, but decided on going to a small bar on Sunset Blvd. called Ye Coach & Horses. By chance, just a booth over from us, sat Drew Barrymore, her then boyfriend Eric Erlandson of Hole, and two others. Quite inspired by the sighting, we dashed across the street to a 24-hour Kinko's copy shop and, between the four of us, whipped out an 8-page zine filled with all kinds of Drew-ish references—from Firestarter to E.T.—in no more than 30 minutes. We then returned to the bar and hand delivered our creation to her. I guess it was met with disdain, or so I later gleaned after hearing someone remark outside the bar that some jerks had given Drew "a really rude fanzine." Gertie, walk with me!

the smut peddlers are coming to florida this weekend

From "Fuck You (That's Why)" to "Let's Get Fucked Up" and "Invisible Man", we've known the Smut Peddlers for quite some time now—and, as a result, you've known them for quite some time as well*. They're a staple fixture in the South Bay/SoCal punk rock scene since 1993, but this weekend they're trading out Orange County for the Orange State of Florida.

On Friday, April 20th, a/k/a today, they'll be appearing in Miami at Churchill's Pub (5501 NE 2nd Ave.) along with Unit Six, Stay Hitt, The 707s, and Vice City Rackers.

Then, on Saturday, April 21st, a/k/a tomorrow, they'll be swinging up into Tampa to play at The Brass Mug (14811 N. Florida Ave.) with Unit Six, Feral Babies, Jesus and the Gangbang Whores, and Mosquito Teeth.

If they still have them in stock, be sure to pick up a "Fuck you/That's why" T-shirt at the show. They're a real conversation starter, among other things, depending how you like your conversation served up. And if you get a chance to talk to Gish, the bass player of the Smuts, be sure to ask him about the very first time Jeff Tremaine came to one of their shows (it was at Frogs, if that helps his memory at all).

* Should you persist in insisting that you know not of whom we speak, please feast your ignorant eyes and ears on the video above directed by Rick Kosick.

happy high five day!

I don't know squat about this "holiday" or how it came into being (and, in the proud upstanding tradition of the lazy ass school of Big Brother journalism, I just can't bring myself to click it up in the Peoples' Dicktionary), but it would seem deeply remiss if we were to miss out on its celebration. After all, it was the slap seen round the world in jackass 3D when Bam Margera was sent back to the 13th century with full Victorian force. And, in all honestly, where would Danger Ehren be today if he hadn't fallen for the soup? High five!

(Photos by Sean Cliver; Burbank, California 2010)

the brain farm digital cinema reel

The words "beauty" and "jackass" may not always be the closest of neighbors—give or take some wayward artistic sensibilities—but I do believe we came our closest to the pretty realms of pulchritude* on jackass 3D. You know the bits I'm talking about. From when the kids were back to simply talkin' baseball, all those super slow motion sequences where time went by in frame-by-frame glory. I'd spotlighted the camera responsible for said shots a while ago (see the Phantom and the men who drool over the Phantom here), but here's the latest hot shit sizzle reel from Brain Farm Digital Cinema, the Key Masters of the Phantom:

* A word that sounds like something that might possibly fall out of Dave England's ass or exude from Preston Lacy's pores, making it the optimal word to be used in conjunction with jackass should any form of beauty need be described.

catching up with bell and on pace with pastrana...

One of the best things about growing up Dickhouse is the extended family we've acquired throughout the years. It may not be The Waltons ... it's probably closer to a modern day Brady Bunch or Addams Family if you crossed and interbred them with say the Modern Family family tree and the Bluths from Arrested Development (hold on, let me Writers' Guild that shit—I think I'm onto some next level soft serve for Bravo or Hallmark), but it's still the finest home sweet dysfunctional home I've ever known.

Anyway, before I go off the deep end and blow a Nielsen, let's get back to the new matter at hand: Andy Bell's new production company, Sweatpants Media, which is sure to succeed because one of his partners is named Colt Seman! Oh yeah.

Currently, Sweatpants is whipping out a 20-episode reality series called On Pace With Pastrana, which is exactly what it sounds like: A camera crew follows Travis around as he transitions to NASCAR and married life, providing an uncircumcised look into all the crazy shit that makes TP tick.

Here's the first episode:

Tons of lubed love but missed the '70s boat? Lots of fantasies but no island, plane, or midjit to fulfill them with? Fear not, disciple of Dick, for Nitro Circus Season 1 and Season 2 are still available on DVD.

the flatulent sounds of science

Honestly, who even cares if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it? Especially when the scientific world at large has provided us with a "torpedo-shaped robot" to detect when fish fart in the ocean. Finally, right? I mean, there's only a few things I've been patienty waiting for since the '70s, and I'm not talking about the streamlined, phallus-soaked, sci-fi world of Flash Gordon. But I did have my heart set on an in-home teleportation pod, and I was genuinely, albeit perversely, looking forward to a fearful, paranoid life in a pervading world atmosphere of Orwellian dystopia. And I'm sure the concept of discerning and ecologically capitalizing upon fish flatulence wasn't far behind those broken Bradbury promises. So, all in all, it really has been one big futuristic bummer for me up until now ... kind of like when our big jackassian dream of lighting fart bubbles as they burbled up and burst upon the surface of the water didn't pan out*. But if fish can fart and be heard by mankind then perhaps one day science will come to our emotionally-stunted rescue, too. Keep reaching for the stars!

http://news.sciencemag.org/sciencenow/2012/03/scienceshot-robot-records-fish.html

* To be fair to everyone involved, this experiment didn't exactly get its fair shake in the sun. Misguidedly, we allowed Dave England to participate in the farting fun and he soon contaminated our petri dish with an unexpected shart. Why I say "unexpected", I don't know, because what else can be expected of his faulty fundament? Certainly not dryarrhea.

(Photo by Sean Cliver; Hollywood, California 2006)

tonight on all-new episodes of fantasy factory...

Remember when Johnny Knoxville butted into jackassworld.rip one day with a photo of his supposedly new and improved tush? You know, where there once was none and now there was suddenly some? I always wondered about that. He claimed squats and stuff, but ... I don't know. I mean, it was pretty white boy weak for the longest time. Then again, when he did finally bare it in jackass 3D after the "Bad Dog" bit, even I had to admit it looked pretty bumpin', teeth marks and all. Anyway, while waitin for his rebuttal to my asinine remarks, it looks like things are going to get gluteus tonight on Rob Dyrdek's Fantasy Factory, so tune in to the MTV at 10/9 C to catch Big Black as he introduces the "The Butt-let"...

Fantasy Factory (Season 5) - Full Episodes

...and then back that fantasy ass up when Chanel goes from a small to a medium on "Ghosts In The Factory":

Fantasy Factory (Season 5) - Full Episodes

all-new loiter squad tonight on adult swim

He's not your Uncle Sam, but Jeff Tremaine wants you to watch an all-new episode of Loiter Squad tonight on Adult Swim at 11:30pm ET/PT. Go tell it on the mountain, Taco!