Honestly, who even cares if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it? Especially when the scientific world at large has provided us with a "torpedo-shaped robot" to detect when fish fart in the ocean. Finally, right? I mean, there's only a few things I've been patienty waiting for since the '70s, and I'm not talking about the streamlined, phallus-soaked, sci-fi world of Flash Gordon. But I did have my heart set on an in-home teleportation pod, and I was genuinely, albeit perversely, looking forward to a fearful, paranoid life in a pervading world atmosphere of Orwellian dystopia. And I'm sure the concept of discerning and ecologically capitalizing upon fish flatulence wasn't far behind those broken Bradbury promises. So, all in all, it really has been one big futuristic bummer for me up until now ... kind of like when our big jackassian dream of lighting fart bubbles as they burbled up and burst upon the surface of the water didn't pan out*. But if fish can fart and be heard by mankind then perhaps one day science will come to our emotionally-stunted rescue, too. Keep reaching for the stars!
* To be fair to everyone involved, this experiment didn't exactly get its fair shake in the sun. Misguidedly, we allowed Dave England to participate in the farting fun and he soon contaminated our petri dish with an unexpected shart. Why I say "unexpected", I don't know, because what else can be expected of his faulty fundament? Certainly not dryarrhea.
(Photo by Sean Cliver; Hollywood, California 2006)