On this Memorial Day, I am memorizing lots of things. I was super good at it in school. Sunday school, too! I could whiz through the Commandments, the Lord's Prayer, that other Catechismy stuff, and all the rest of the text-heavy hallelujah-this and hallelujah-that. Over the years I've managed to somehow maintain this cerebral talent despite all the brain damning things I've done. However—and this is a big HOWEVER—the one thing I've always had difficulty with is names. In one ear and out the other. Gone for eternity or until the next awkward re-introduction. So it always helps to have those li'l mnemonic tricks to make moniker things stick. Take the name "Duff" for instance. Already it's one step beyond in terms of a lifelong handle, so that's all good, but what it really has going for it is the association to Springfield's finest: Duff Beer. Then there was that one MTV VJ Duff. She was cute! And of course there's Duff McKagan, the bass twiddler for Guns N' Roses. Oh, and it was also a shoe brand once started by Steve Rocco, the progenitor of Big Brother skateboard magazine, among other things. So tonight's all-new episode of Ridiculousness shall be remembered by me for all of the above stated reasons and not because I've never seen "Ace of Cakes" (sorry, I'm not a "foodie", I just like to be crushed a lot). 10/9 C on the MTV.