Once upon a time in Big Brother skateboard mag history, a rag-tag crew—consisting Tobin Yelland, Dave Carnie, Jeff Tremaine, Kendra Gaeta, and Earl Parker—all hit and caromed about the Pacific-Northwest trail in search of stories and photos, but Tremaine found more, much more, including a bruised tailbone! So the legend goes, our intrepid journalists and raconteurs went to a Melvins performance where Tremaine just so happened to find his way onstage. Bear in mind this was many, many moons before Tremaine was heralded as "The Emperor" and, as such, blessed with wondrous privileges not usually bestowed upon your average asshole. Back then he was simply just an asshole and, as such, faced the ungodly amount of obstacles that stand between "us" and "them" and any "fun" between. Random case in point being his getting ousted from a Guided By Voices show in West Hollywood, circa 1995, after ambling onstage and snagging a beer from Bob's personal onstage cooler, but I digress. This was the Melvins, a far heavier sound and hairier sort than GBV, and on this particular occasion Tremaine directed all his onstage antics and energy to merely jumping off in classic stage dive form. The problem was, however, that the crowd found religion, perceived him as Moses, and abruptly parted like the Red-fucking-Sea while he was mid-air. And so it came to pass that down, down, down he went, bouncing his dumbass off the concrete floor with all the grace of an anvil. Why am I even bothering to mention this? Tune into tonight's all-new episode of Ridiculousness with Tyler the Creator and Taco of Odd Future doing the guest-star couch craze at 10/9 C on the MTV.
(Photo by Rick Kosick; Hollywood, California 2012)